Why you should buy your daughter a vibrator for her sixteenth b-day

Why you should buy your daughter a vibrator for her sixteenth b-day

I know some may be appalled by the title, but I have been giving this much thought. This is not for the women who have daughters and are open with their daughters and have an open door policy to talk about anything. This is not for the women who realize they brought their daughters into the world, therefore it is her responsibility to guide, lead and help her child along life's journey.

This is for the women who will be honest with themselves and think back to when, when they were 16 and what was really going on in their hearts and bodies.

I was told by mother to stay sweet for my sweet sixteen. That was it, her expectation for me and my body went no further in her mind and our conversation than my 16Th birthday. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that she had me at 15. Maybe in some twisted way she thought if I made it pass 15 and was still a virgin I would be safe, and she would have accomplished whatever it is she felt her duty was to me.

It was not hard for me to hold up to my end of the bargain. I took pride in being a virgin, I saw the difference in how I was treated and how girls who were giving in to peer pressure and low self esteem were treated. I could walk in any room with my head held high. I didn't have the best clothes, hair or anything you can place in the blank, but I had my virginity.

After my 16Th birthday I was approached by a boy in the neighborhood who had been working on me for months. My mother wasn't there for me to go to, mentally or physically. I could have picked up the phone and called her but it never happens like that. I was doing great in school, I had hopes and dreams of becoming a lawyer. But by the time the smooth talker put his trap into high gear I had began to give up. I was 16 now. There was no one there telling me how important it was to hold on to my purity. What a priceless gift it was to give.

Without getting into the good, bad and the ugly, if no one was there to tell me how important my virginity was, the conversation of my future, goals and aspirations were little to none. I had outsiders cheering for me, but we know it's futile when you are getting the opposite from your home team.

How many ladies out there are willing to admit, once we give in that first time, we spend a good majority of our life trying to get it right, and experience what it was we were suppose to get that first time.

I have a wonderful man in my life, and I get complimented on how great he is often. I don't let it go to my head and I definitely don't forget where I came from. "I kissed a lot of nasty frogs to get my prince".

What if my mother had been there for me and instead of just saying "don't bring no babies home", explained the whys and why not's. Now that I am an adult I understand that adults believe if you see them struggling and going thru because of their choices, you will make different choices. It just does not work that way. Generational cycles are very real.

If my mother would have bought me a vibrator for my 16Th birthday and sat me down and told me about the power that my body really holds and the life you lead once you start handing that power over recklessly, wow. What or where could I be right now. If we look back at the majority of the issues and things that went wrong in life as women, I bet you can tie sex in the issue no matter what it is.

I don't have a daughter, but when I'm blessed with one, I'm not going to worry about planning for some dumb party that will come and go, I'm going to be busy arming her with freedom and knowledge of who she is and who she could be.